September 29, 2017

Eliminating the 'N' Word...

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I know what you're thinking... 'Kristin, you still use the 'N' word' don't judge me but I'm not speaking of that 'N' word. I'm speaking of the word 'Nervous'. As many of you know, I'm in an upcoming show next week; singing. Yes, singing. Now I know and you know that singing is actually a talent of mine. But 9 times out of 10, I'd let that 'N' word get the best of me. This time around, I told myself that I wasn't going to use it... at all. Words become you, and often times, what you speak is what you project. Sooo many times I've been asked to sing in public and my response is usually 'you know I'm nervous', and that's exactly what I projected... nerves.

I totally BOMBED this Summer at my Family Reunion because of that pesky word. The song I chose to sing, I could pretty much sing backwards but I totally F'D it up... bad. Singers are already SUPER critical of ourselves, so I beat myself up bad. Afterwards, I prayed for God to allow me to use ALL of the talents that He's given me boldly and fearlessly. It seemed like right after that prayer, an old co-worker/friend reached out with this particular opportunity.

*Side Note- this is exactly why you have to be careful what you pray for and ready to receive just that.*

Honestly, I'm not sure where this overwhelming sense of 'N' word actually came from. I've song countless times in church, in high school/college, and in several weddings. I actually did the Sweet Auburn festival (twice) in Atlanta. I know that I have issues with being put on the spot to sing but that's primarily it.

I end this post by saying... whatever talent that's bestowed upon you, it's given to you for a reason; to share with the world and not to keep to yourself. It's okay to feel the initial vibrations of the 'N' word, but its not okay for it to rob and take over your greatness. Lastly, remember to speak life to every situation as well as words of encouragement over yourself; for you are what you say you are.